Happiness Means Quiet Nerves.

Ye Gads, No! I Couldn't Stand The Noise.

I Spent Half My Money On Gambling, Alcohol And Wild Women. The Other Half I Wasted.

It's What You Do That Counts And Not What You Say; Therefore I Fired My Press Agent.

Sex Isn't Necessary. You Don't Die Without It, But You Can Die Having It.

What Would You Do If You Were President, And, On The First Day Of May, The Russian Ambassador Presented You With A Beautiful Cake Which Emitted A Curious Ticking Noise? Would You Plunge It Into A Pail Of Water - Thus Insulting Soviet Cuisine In General?