When Life Hands You Lemons, Make Whisky

A Man Without A Woman Is Like A Neck Without A Pain.

If I Had To Live My Life Over, I'd Live Over A Saloon.

Never Try To Impress A Woman, Because If You Do She'll Expect You To Keep Up The Standard For The Rest Of Your Life.

I Would Rather Be Living In Philadelphia.

What Would You Do If You Were President, And, On The First Day Of May, The Russian Ambassador Presented You With A Beautiful Cake Which Emitted A Curious Ticking Noise? Would You Plunge It Into A Pail Of Water - Thus Insulting Soviet Cuisine In General?