For The Sake Of Your Marriage, Get

You Know, Before I Would Think, My Cab Driver Hates Me. Now I Think My Limo Driver Hates Me.

I Came From An Italian House. The Refrigerator Was Always Full. I Never Knew You Had To Buy Food. I Thought There Were Food Fairies That Came At Night.

I Put Myself On Tape And The Cool Thing Was That Martin Scorsese Had Never Heard Of Me. He Had Never Seen [everybody Loves Raymond]. I Was Just An Unknown Actor To Him. I Don't Want To Sound Conceited, Like He Has To Know Who I Am, But That Seemed A Little Odd. He's A Film Genius. He Doesn't Watch Sitcoms.

I Do Know Its Important To Keep The Romantic Spark Alive In Your Marriage. But With Four Kids, Sometimes It's Enough Just To Keep Yourself Alive.

Parents, Just Keep In Mind That Kids Will Always Round Off To The Nearest Obscenity.