Everyone Self-googles. And, I Have, Of Course,

I Think Maybe I Became Funny Because As A Kid, I Was A Jew In A Town Of No Jews, And Being Funny Just Instinctively Came About As A Way To Put People At Ease Around Me.

I Love Children. I'm Embarrassingly Baby-crazy.

By The Time I Would Have Graduated, At 22, I Was A Writer And Featured Performer On Saturday Night Live.

People Say, Like, "i Love When You Smile Because Part Of Your Mouth Goes Up," Then I Never Organically Smile Again.

I Was Going To Get An Abortion The Other Day. I Totally Wanted An Abortion. And It Turns Out I Was Just Thirsty.