Every Dude In Here Has Had A

Next Time Your Lady Leaves The Room, Take A Dump On The Floor! 'cuz There Is Nothing More Mysterious Than A Dump On The Floor! And It Always Starts A Conversation, Am I Right? Honey, What Happened? You Better Hold Me 'cause I'm Afraid.

If You Take Off Your Pants And Her First Reaction Is, "awwww, Look At It...like A Little Baby Jesus." Time To Buy A Porsche.

I'm Very Romantic When I Masturbate. Sometimes I Light A Candle...then I Try And Shoot It Out. It's Like A Carnival.

Don't Get Me Wrong, I Like To Cuddle. But There Is Such A Fine Line Between Cuddling And Holding Someone Down So That They Can't Get Away.

Every Dude In Here Has Had A Fantasy About Jessica Simpson. Here's Mine: Jessica, Hold Your Sister Ashlee So I Can Kick Her In The Throat.