Anyone Who Has Dead Straight Hair Wants

I Can't Tan Naturally.

I'm Very Bad At Having Heroes. I Don't Rate Anyone Particularly Highly Because I'm So Snide And Competitive And Not Very Nice.

I Was Trained As An Actress. But I Wasn't A Very Convincing Actress, So I Started Doing Punk Poetry And Then Fell Into Doing Stand-up.

Well, I Really Don't Like Heights. I Don't Get On The Top Deck Of A Double-decker Because That's A Bit High For Me. I Always Feel That I'm Going To Hurl Myself Off, So Heights Are A Problem.

I'm A Schizophrenic Mix Of Wannabe Glamourpuss And Absolute Slob, And My Style Is Very Much Magistrate-meets-barmaid.