You Never Want To Be The Grumpy

There Was One Time Where I Failed To Perform Sexually. My Girlfriend Said To Me "oh Don't Worry, It Happens To A Lot Of Guys". Ok, There Are Two Things Wrong With That. First Of All Who Are These Other Guys?, And Second Of All If It's Happening To More Than One Of Us, Don't You Think It Could Be Your Fault?

British Scientists Have Demonstrated That Cigarettes Can Harm Your Children. Fair Enough. Use An Ashtray!

I Think They Got It Wrong With Saddam Hussein. They Thought He Had The A-bomb. Instead He Had A Bomb.

I've Got A Friend Whose Nickname Is "shagger". You Might Think That's Pretty Cool. She Doesn't Like It.

I Love Those People Who Do Story-telling And Who Ramble On, But I Don't Do That, I Tell Jokes - The Sort Of Jokes That Anyone Really Could Tell In The Pub.