You Know Why I Feel Older? I

I Now Consider It A Good Day When I Don't Step On My Boobs.

The Ideal Beauty Is A Fugitive Which Is Never Found.

My Mother Could Make Anybody Feel Guilty - She Used To Get Letters Of Apology From People She Didn't Even Know.

I Said Justin Bieber Looked Like A Little Lesbian -- And I Stand By It: He's The Daughter Cher Wishes She'd Had.

I Knew I Was An Unwanted Baby When I Saw That My Bath Toys Were A Toaster And A Radio.