You Know It's A Sad Day When

All The Shy People Are Doomed! Natural Selection Favors The Loud And The Aggressive

Because Their Bones Are Growing, They Can Only Sleep In Certain Positions, Obviously. The Crucifix And The Swastika Tend To Be The Most Popular. Sometimes A Combination Of The Two.

I Suppose The Best Comedy Shows Do Have The Rock N' Roll Feeling - If It's A Great Night, And The Roof Is Raised Yeah, It's A Similar Feeling, Sure.

Kids, They Are Always Hurting Themselves. It's Like, "quick, Get Me To Casualty Quick!" While Your Doing Something Important Like Sitting Down Picking Your Ear.

You Know What You Are? You're A Beard With An Idiot Hanging Off It.