When You Put Listerine In Your Mouth,

I Had The Cab Driver Drive Me Here Backwards, And The Dude Owed Me $27.50.

I Went To A Record Store, They Said They Specialized In Hard-to-find Records. Nothing Was Alphabetized!

I Have An Oscillating Fan At My House. It Goes Back And Forth. It Looks Like The Fan Is Saying "no." So I Like To Ask It Questions That A Fan Would Say "no" To! Do You Keep My Hair In Place? Do You Keep My Documents In Order? Do You Have 3 Settings? Liar! My Fan Lied To Me. Now I Will Pull The Pin Up. Now You're Not Saying Anything!

Well, I Was Lost But Now I Live Here! I Have Severely Improved My Predicament!

I Was Going To Stay Overnight At My Friend's House - He Said, "you'll Have To Sleep On The Floor." Damn Gravity! You Don't Know How Bad I Wanted To Sleep On The Wall.