When Someone Shows You A Picture Of

Drunken Behavior Will Not Be Tolerated, Except By Those Who Are Being Hilarious.

Sometimes, When Something Really Great Happens To Me, I Like To Wait Two Weeks Before I Tell Anyone About It, Because I Like To Use The Word 'fortnight'.

It Turns Out Dentists Don't Like It Very Much When You Show Up For A Cleaning In Full Vampire Gear.

Here Is A Tip For All You Young People Drinking Wine. With Pasta, Drink White Wine. With Steak, Drink Red Wine. And If You're Vegan, You're Annoying.

You Are Ten Times More Likely To Get Hit By A Car When The Driver Is Aiming For You.