Went To The Corner Shop - Bought

My Dog Was Barking At Everyone The Other Day. Still, What Can You Expect From A Cross-breed.

A Man Walks Into Doctor's Office. "what Seems To Be The Problem?" Asks The Doc. "it's ... Um ... Well ... I Have Five Penises." Replies The Man. "blimey!" Says The Doctor, "how Do Your Trousers Fit?" "like A Glove."

A Woman Tells Her Doctor, 'i've Got A Bad Back.' The Doctor Says, 'it's Old Age.' The Woman Says, 'i Want A Second Opinion.' The Doctor Says: 'okay - You're Ugly As Well.'

So A Lorry-load Of Tortoises Crashed Into A Train-load Of Terrapins, I Thought "that's A Turtle Disaster".

I Always Sit In The Tail End Of A Plane, Always. You Never Hear Of An Plane Backing Into A Mountain.