To My Knowledge, I Was The First

I Have No Idea What I'm Going To Say When I Stand Up To Give A Toast. But I Do Know That Anything I Say I Find Funny.

In The Old Days, That Was My Ad-lib For Hecklers In The Joints I Worked. It Stuck With Me. I Hardly Say It Now, Say, To Fans, Even Though People Do Send Me Hockey Pucks.

I Take Pride In Being Very Unique In What I Do. Nobody Else Can Do What I Do And I Don't Mean To Say That Egotistically, It's Just Something In My Personality.

I Was Sitting In The Toilet And I Was By Myself. I Was Tired Of Playing With The Roller, So I Said I'd Better Write A Book.

An Insult Comic Is The Title I Was Given. What I Do Is Exaggeration. I Make Fun Of People, At Life, Of Myself And My Surroundings.