To Enjoy A Good Reputation, Give Publicly,

Knowledge Is Like Money, The More A Man Gits The More He Hankers For.

Liberty, Like Chastity, Once Lost, Can Never Be Regained In Its Original Purity.

Contentment Is A Kind Of Moral Laziness; If There Wasn't Anything But Contentment In His World, Man Wouldn't Be Any More Of A Success Than An Angleworm Is

If You Would Make Yourself Agreeable Wherever You Go, Listen To The Grievances Of Others But Never Relate Your Own.

When You Do Laugh, Open Your Mouth Wide Enough For The Noise To Get Out Without Squealing, Throw Your Head Back As Though You Were Going To Be Shaved, Hold On To Your False Hair With Both Hands And Then Laugh Till Your Soul Gets Thoroughly Rested.