This Is A Pie Chart About Procrastination.

I'm Not A Lawmaker, But I Was Thinking That If You Have A Really Loud Ring Tone, Maybe You Should Be Stabbed In The Ear?

When I Look Up At The Clouds I See So Many Animals, Mostly Sheep Who Have Lost Their Limbs And Heads.

The Easiest Time To Add Insult To Injury Is When You're Signing Somebody's Cast.

When Telling A Story About How Wasted You Were Last Night, Stop.

Whenever I See An Autobiography For Sale In The Book Store I Just Flip To The About The Author Section. I'm Like, "done, Next!"