There Are Two Ways To Handle A

Politics Makes Strange Post-masters.

Beauty Is . . . A Valuable Asset If You're Poor Or Haven't Any Sense.

There Are Two Ways To Handle A Woman, And Nobody Knows Either Of Them.

I'm Sorry To Inform You That Your 50 Year Warranty Has Expired On Your Back, Knees, And Memory. Luckily Your Lifetime Warranty On Your Heart Is Still In Effect. Of Course, That Becomes Void And Expires When You Do.

Gossip Is Vice Enjoyed Vicariously - The Sweet, Subtle Satisfaction Without The Risk.