Flattery Won't Hurt You If You Don't

Intelligent People Are Always On The Unpopular Side Of Anything.

There's Another Advantage To Being Poor - A Doctor Will Cure You Faster.

I'm Sorry To Inform You That Your 50 Year Warranty Has Expired On Your Back, Knees, And Memory. Luckily Your Lifetime Warranty On Your Heart Is Still In Effect. Of Course, That Becomes Void And Expires When You Do.

When A Woman Says, 'i Don't Wish To Mention Any Names', It Means It Ain't Necessary To Mention Any Names.

An Optimist Is A Fellow Who Believes What's Going To Be Will Be Postponed