The Truth Is That I'm Constitutionally Incapable

If You're A Comic, You Don't Have A Rehearsal Room, You Rehearse On Stage. My Main Concern Is Remembering Everything.

You're Talking To A Modern, Nice, Affable German Person And They're Saying To You Something Like 'you Know, Vell, It's A Critical Time Now For Germany Within Europe, Also Globally, Economically Ve Are Pretty Good, Ve Have Been Better. But Ve Are Very Vibrant In The Theater And Arts...' And All The Time You'll Be Listening To This, You're Thinking Mmm, Yeah, Mmm... Hitler, Hitler, Hitler, Hitler, Hitler.

You Learn Very Very Quickly That It Is Mostly About Swearing, Actually. That's All You're Doing, Swearing, In A Box With Wheels.

If You Covered A Broom Handle With Oil And Shoved It Up My Arse, Then Put Me On A Trampoline, In A Lift, I Could Write A Better Song On The Walls.

Women Are Like Canoes, Full Of Soup. At First Everyone Is Suspicious But Then Everyone Wants One.