The True Test Of Humility Is Whether

More Than Ever Before, Americans Are Suffering From Back Problems: Back Taxes, Back Rent, Back Auto Payments.

I Remember When Humor Was Gentle Pokes. I Used To Call It 'arm Around The Shoulder' Humor. Now They Go For The Jugular And They Take No Prisoners. It's Mean, Mean Stuff.

Lincoln Was Known To Have Walked Miles To Borrow Books, To Get The Most Rudimentary Form Of Education. So What Do We Do On His Birthday? We Close The Schools!

Sociologists Say That Going To The Movies Is A Bonding Experience. It Probably Has To Do With The Way You Feet Stick To The Floor.

With My Luck, If I Ever Invested In General Motors, They'd Bust It To Corporal!