The Little Boy Inside Of All Us

I Can Do More Than Just Stand-up Comedy, And The Only Way I'll Be Able To Show That Is If I Do It Myself. Because Nobody Trusts That I Can Do It.

I'm Willing To Write A Check For $10,000 If Someone Can Bring To Me What I Fell Is Ruining Thousands Of Lives, Destroying Lives Everyday. And I Know That You Know It's A Little Thing Called Chupacabra.

You Need To Open Up Your Soul And Have A Weep-a-thon.

Text A Guy You Like Right Now, "i'm Thinking About You." If He Says, "mmm Are You In Bed?" Never Speak To Him Again He's A Lifelong Moron.

I Got Home From Work Today And Took Like A One Hundred Hour Nap. No You Did Not. You'd Be Very Sick If You Were Taking One Hundred Hour Naps. That's A Coma! If You Said You Took A Coma After Work I'd Be Able To Follow The Story.