That I Walk Around Calling People 'dummy'

What I Do Is, I Make Fun Of People And I Make Fun Of Myself And Things Around Us And Exaggerate Things. And I'm Never Mean-spirited. See, The Word Insult Means Some Guy Who's A Real Unkind Human Being. But I Don't Do That, Because Otherwise I Wouldn't Be Headlining All These Years, Thank God, And All These People Showing Up To See Me.

Everything I Do On Stage, I Made Up In Saloons. I Started Doing It In Front Of People, And That Became My Performance. I Never Had Writers.

People Think Being In Your Seventies Means Sitting Around In A Chair With A Blanket Over Your Legs, Drooling.

Alan King, A Comedian I Adored, Was Considered Society, And I Was Considered The Jewish Kid From The Neighborhood.

I Think If I Took Therapy, The Doctor Would Quit. He'd Just Pick Up The Couch And Walk Out Of The Room.