Start Every Day Off With A Smile

Start Every Day Off With A Smile And Get It Over With.

If You Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Baffle Them With Bull.

Thou Shalt Not Kill Anything Less Than A Fifth.

Comedy Is A Serious Business. A Serious Business With Only One Purpose--to Make People Laugh.

If I Ever Found A Church That Didn't Believe In Knocking All The Other Churches, I Might Consider Joining It.