So I Rang Up A Local Building

I Used To Be Indecisive But Now I Am Not Quite Sure

So I Went To The Doctor's Yesterday. He Said, "what Appears To Be The Problem?" I Said, "i Keep Having This Dream, Night After Night, Beautiful Girls Rushing Towards Me And I Keep Pushing Them Away." He Said, "how Can I Help?" I Said: "break My Arms."

A Policeman Stopped Me And Said: Would You Please Blow Into This Bag, Sir? I Said: What For, Officer? He Said: My Chips Are Too Hot.

I Cleaned The Attic With The Wife The Other Day. Now I Can't Get The Cobwebs Out Of Her Hair.

So A Lorry-load Of Tortoises Crashed Into A Train-load Of Terrapins, I Thought "that's A Turtle Disaster".