She Was So Ugly That Her Face

My Mom Took Me To A Dog Show And I Won!!

I Told My Psychiatrist That Everyone Hates Me. He Said I Was Being Ridiculous - Everyone Hasn't Met Me Yet.

My Father Carries Around The Picture Of The Kid Who Came With His Wallet.

I Tell Ya, Sex Is Getting Harder All The Time. Me And My Wife Were Trying To Have Sex For Hours Last Night And I Finally Gave Up. I Asked Her, "what, You Can't Think Of Anybody Either?"

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. My Mother Breast Fed Me Through A Straw.