She Wanted An Italian Sports Car -

My Wife And I Were Shopping For The Whole Family. In The Music Department My Wife Said, "let's Get Your Nephew A Set Of Drums. That's What Your Brother Did To Us Last Year."

My Wife Can't Figure Out What To Buy Me. What Do You Give A Man Who's Had Everything Up To Here?

Remember When You Had Your Face Lifted... And The Guy Brought It Back.

It Was A Tough School. The Kids On The Debating Team Took Steroids!

Talk About Cheap - On Christmas Eve, My Neighbour Shoots Off Three Blanks And Tells His Kids Santa Claus Just Committed Suicide.