(responding To A Sneeze From The Audience)

The Oboe Sounds Like A Clarinet With A Cold.

(referring To The Piano's Natural Shape) Isn't It A Shame When Those Big Fat Opera Singers Lean Against The Pianos And Bend Them?

Clarinets, Like Lawyers, Have Cases, Mouthpieces, And They Need A Constant Supply Of Hot Air In Order To Function.

It (the Double-clarinet In India) Was Primarily Used For Snake Charming, Since The Snake Would Do Almost Anything To Get The Indians To Stop Playing It.

There Is A Bit Of Hans Christian Andersen In Every Dane.