People Make Fools Out Of Themselves In

It Is Easy To Tell The Difference Between Jews And Gentiles. After The Show, All The Gentiles Are Saying 'have A Drink? Want A Drink? Let's Have A Drink!' While All The Jews Are Saying 'have You Eaten Yet? Want A Piece Of Cake? Let's Have Some Cake!

My Material Is As New As Anything On The Dinner Table. What Difference Does It Make If I'm 70 Or If I'm 20? The Audience Knows They Aren't Getting Any Old Stories From Me.

I've Got A Friend Who Is Half-jewish And Half-italian. If He Can't Buy It Wholesale, He Steals It!

Older Jews Think Of Franklin Delano Roosevelt And See Themselves As Siding With The Working Class And The Poor, So They Continue To Vote The Way They Do.

My Comedy Doesn't Come From Any Calculations And Studies.