People Come Up To Me... Concerned... That

When I Went To College, My Parents Threw A Going Away Party For Me, According To The Letter.

My Mother Was Like A Sister To Me, Only We Didn't Have Sex Quite So Often.

Lord Please Break The Laws Of The Universe For My Convenience. Amen.

My Girlfriend Told Me That She Was Seeing Another Man. I Told Her To Rub Her Eyes.

I Caught My Wife In Bed With Another Man And I Was Crushed. So I Said, "get Off Of Me, You Two!"