100% Of The People Who Give 110%

Americans Who Do Not Celebrate Independence Day: Pets.

Leave No Stone Unturned In Your Quest To Disrupt A Rock Garden.

When I Was In High School I Experimented Sexually. The Experiment Was To Never Have Sex With Anybody No Matter How Hard I Tried. Success! Hypothesis Confirmed.

I Am Sometimes Referred To As Excuse Me In An Annoyed Tone Of Voice, Because Apparently I Am In The Way. I Am So Sorry. I Am Supposed To Be Some Sort Of Mind Reader, I Guess. I Am Moving Out Of The Way Now As Slowly As I Possibly Can. I Am Doing This And There's Nothing You Can Do About It.

If I Think Of A Joke That's Really Dirty And I Think It's Funny I'll Try It But What I've Found Over The Years Is They Just Don't Laugh. It Doesn't Work Coming Out Of My Mouth So It's Like They Taught Me 'don't Do That. Don't Go That Way Or You'll Lose Me.'