Newt Gingrich Plans To Announce His Campaign

Thank You, Horseradish, For Being Neither A Radish Nor A Horse. What You Are Is A Liar Food.

I'm So Excited. Jay Leno Is On The Show Tonight. He Brought Some Really Funny Jokes And Some Great Stories. Although I'm A Little Concerned He Also Brought His Old Desk And Kevin Eubanks. I Just Want Jay To Be Comfortable, But Not Too Comfortable.

When I See Professional Clowns, Mimes, Or People Who Makes Ballon Animals, I Think Of Their Relatives And How Disappointed They Must Be.

A Man In Thailand Was Arrested With More Than 10,000 Pairs Of Stolen Underwear. Legal Experts Are Expecting A Brief Trial.

Rick Perry Said Donald Trump Is Unfit To Be President And Called For Him To Immediately Withdraw From The Race. Then He Said, 'and That's Coming From Me!'