My Idea Of Exercise Is A Good

You Know What Keeps Me Humble? Mirrors!

Self-pity Is Better Than None.

This Woman Was So Cross-eyed. She Can Go To A Tennis Match And Never Move Her Head.

Mothers-in-law Do Not Make Good House Pets. Once I Had The Most Wonderful Dream -- I Dreamed That Mothers-in-law Cost Money And I Couldn't Afford One.

I Hate Smart Sales Clerks. I Said To One, What Do You Have In Lingerie? She Says, More Than You'll Ever Have!