My Father Was Never Very Friendly. When

Women Are More Accommodating. If A Woman Drinks The Last Glass Of Apple Juice In The Refrigerator, She'll Make More Apple Juice. If A Man Drinks The Last Glass Of Apple Juice, He'll Just Put Back The Empty Container.

You Know The Oxygen Masks On Airplanes? I Don't Think There's Really Any Oxygen. I Think They're Just To Muffle The Screams.

I Was A Vegetarian Until I Started Leaning Toward The Sunlight.

Men Will Now Get Up And Walk With The Baby In The Middle Of The Night, Change Its Diapers, And Give It A Bottle, But In Their Heart Of Hearts They Still Think They Shouldn't Have To.

My Husband Gave Me A Necklace. It's Fake. I Requested Fake. Maybe I'm Paranoid, But In This Day And Age, I Don't Want Something Around My Neck That's Worth More Than My Head.