I Read Recipes The Same Way I

I Was Going With Someone For A Few Years, But We Broke Up. It Was One Of Those Things. He Wanted To Get Married, And I Didn't Want Him To.

Envy The Kangaroo. That Pouch Setup Is Extraordinary; The Baby Crawls Out Of The Womb When It Is About Two Inches Long, Gets Into The Pouch, And Proceeds To Mature. I'd Have A Baby If It Would Develop In My Handbag.

When A Woman Tries On Clothing From Her Closet That Feels Tight, She Will Assume She Has Gained Weight. When A Man Tries Something From His Closet That Feels Tight, He Will Assume The Clothing Has Shrunk.

Women Take Clothing Much More Seriously Than Men. I've Never Seen A Man Walk Into A Party And Say "oh, My God, I'm So Embarrassed; Get Me Out Of Here. There's Another Man Wearing A Black Tuxedo.

I Don't Think Jogging Is Healthy, Especially Morning Jogging. If Morning Joggers Knew How Tempting They Looked To Morning Motorists, They Would Stay Home And Do Sit-ups.