Look On The Bright Side; That's One

In April 1975 I Was Born And The Vietnam War Ended. I Could Not Let Any American Die In War Before Seeing An Episode Of Scrubs.

I Just Don't See How Anyone Can Hate America. I Mean, Crap, I Live There. What More Do You Need?

I Think Sports Are Very Beneficial In The Fight Against Obesity. I Remember Playing Little League - I Was The Best Person On The Pitch By A Long Shot. It Was Only Last Weekend Actually, I Think I Have Some Photos Of It If You're Interested.

For Me, Acting In Scenes With Other People Is Like Playing Soccer With A Bunch Of Legless Five Year Olds. It's Not Really Fair To Them, But What Else Can I Do, You Know?

Turning Water To Wine? I Mean C'mon, That's Stupid. They Should Have Let Me Write The Bible.