I Know I Probably Should Be Sad

I Mean, So What If It's A Little Dangerous? A One-armed Kid Is Comedy Gold.

Hitler Had The Right Idea. He Was Just An Underachiever.

In April 1975 I Was Born And The Vietnam War Ended. I Could Not Let Any American Die In War Before Seeing An Episode Of Scrubs.

I Don't Know Why People Were So Upset With Me. Prince Got His Own Symbol. I Just Wanted To Adopt The Handicap Symbol As My Own So I Could Park In Handicap Spots. Deformed People Should Be Honored To Park So Close To Me. Meeting A Celebrity Like Me May Give Them Hope In Their Mistake Of A Life.

Now That 'scrubs' Is Over, People Seem To Feel More Comfortable Telling Me That I Was A Total Douche To Them For The Past 8 Years. And The Whole Time I'm Thinking, 'who Are You?'