Life Goes By Fast. Enjoy It...everyone Gets

Because I'm The Only Performer Who Comes Out And Says I've Had Plastic Surgery, I've Become The Plastic Surgery Poster Girl, Which Is Hilarious, Because Everybody Has Done It And They All Deny It. They Stand There, Like The Bride Of Frankenstein, They've All Got Stitches, And They All Say, 'i've Done Nothing.' I Talk About It.

Both Of My Parents Got To See Me Host Carson, Thank God. That's All Anyone Wants: To Have Their Parents See They're Going To Be All Right In Life.

All My Friends Are Dying. That's Why I Always Wear Black.

You Have To Do More Than Just Kill Time Or Time Will Quickly Kill You.

I Hate Mcdonald's. I Don't Want To Order My Dinner By Yelling Into A Clown's Mouth. If I Want My Face In A Clown's Mouth, I'll Tongue Kiss Glenn Beck.