Kindness Isn't Just A Virtue, Its A

The Other Day My Twelve-year-old Says To Me, I Don't Feel Like I'm With You Right Now. You're In The Car With Me, You're Checking Your E-mail, You're Not Listening To Me, I Don't Feel Like I'm With You. And I Say, You Know What? That Was Your Mother's Gripe, Too. And She Was Right. And You're Also Correct. When You Cop To Something, You Get To The Next Level. In This Case, The Next Level Is: I Just Learned Something From My Twelve-year-old.

I Never Went To Camp As A Kid. I Couldn't Get Into An Ivy League School. I Wouldn't Join A Biker Club.

I Have The Brain Of A German Shepherd And The Body Of A 16-year-old Boy; They’re Both In My Car And I Want You To See Them

The Greatness Of A Man Is Only Measured By His Urologist.

I Can't Do Negative, Needy, Or Narcissistic Anymore. Oh Wait, I Can Still Do The Last One, Aw Nuts.