I Have The Brain Of A German

I Don't Like The Negative Of Reality Tv - The 'you're No Good, So You Have To Leave, I Choose You, But I Thought You Really Loved Me.' It's All About How Bad People Are And I Just Hate That. I Like Pimp My Ride Where Someone Is Helping Somebody.

My Haircutter Figured Out I Whine Less If I'm Under General Anesthesia. I Just Hope When I Awaken They Haven't Given Me A Brazilian Wax.

What I've Learned About Comedy People Is That They're Defined By The Harshest Level They've Been To, Their Personal Auschwitz.

At The End Of The Day It's The End Of The Day.

What Do You Do If You're In The Car And Your Girlfriend Touches Your Crotch Then Asks You To Remind Her To Get Kitchen Scissors?