John Kerry Spent The Day Reading To

One Day You're The Leader Of Iraq, The Next Day You're Being Checked For Fleas On Fox News.

The Candidates At The Republican Debate Looked Like A Town Council That Was Outlawing Dancing. They Looked Like A Board Of Directors That Was Lying About Poisoning A River.

Did You Hear This? They Say Now Osama Bin Laden And His Buddy Mullah Omar Have Left Afghanistan Dressed As Women. They Dressed Up As Women And Went Across The Border Into Pakistan. I Think They're Going To Make A Movie About It. They're Going To Call It 'some Like It Jihad.'

People Are Kind Of Upset With British Petroleum Ceo Tony Hayward. Over The Weekend, He Was Out On His Yacht. And When President Obama Found Out That Tony Hayward Was On His Yacht, He Was So Angry, He Missed A Putt.

The Fcc Has Delayed The Decision On The Time/warner Comcast Merger. So How Do You Think Those Folks Like Being Put On Hold?