I've Got A New Invention. It's A

I'd Rather Not Throw The Ball At All.

He's In A Rut. Gehringer Goes Two For Five On Opening Day And Stays That Way All Season.

If You Don't Throw It, They Can't Hit It.

I'm Something Like The Old Soak Who Never Knew Whether His Wife Told Him To Take One Drink And Come Home At 12, Or Take 12 And Come Home At One.

I've Got A New Invention. It's A Revolving Bowl For Tired Goldfish.