It Is Impossible To Find Twelve Fair

I Don't Drink Anymore, On The Other Hand I Don't Drink Any Less Either.

I Never Worry About Being Driven To Drink; I Just Worry About Being Driven Home.

What Would You Do If You Were President, And, On The First Day Of May, The Russian Ambassador Presented You With A Beautiful Cake Which Emitted A Curious Ticking Noise? Would You Plunge It Into A Pail Of Water - Thus Insulting Soviet Cuisine In General?

The Advantages Of Whiskey Over Dogs Are Legion. Whiskey Does Not Need To Be Periodically Wormed, It Does Not Need To Be Fed, It Never Requires A Special Kennel, It Has No Toenails To Be Clipped Or Coat To Be Stripped. Whiskey Sits Quietly In Its Special Nook Until You Want It. True, Whiskey Has A Nasty Habit Of Running Out, But Then So Does A Dog.

I've Been Drunk Only Once In My Life. But That Lasted For Twenty-three Years.