In Mexico, Everything On The Menu Is

I Don't Understand Art-speak. My Pictures Are Big Doodles. I'm Amazed What People Come Up With When They Look At Them. There's One Of A Figure With Two Heads That Somebody Thought Must Be A Comment On The State Of Matrimony. None Of It Is A Comment On Anything.

I'm Not Going To Throw Away The Hand Of Friendship To Suit 100 Trotskyites In Glasgow.

I Have Been Made Redundant Before And It Is A Terrible Blow; Redundant Is A Rotten Word Because It Makes You Think You Are Useless.

I Used To Have Mad Cow's Disease, But I'm Alright Nooooooooow.

I Once Travelled To Adelaide On Emu Airways. I Was 5,000 Ft Up In The Air When Someone Pointed Out To Me That Emus Can't Fly