In Hollywood If You Don't Have A

The Good News Is That The President Gets Another Chance. The Bad News Is That He'll Be Two Weeks Older.

Ronald Reagan Just Signed The New Tax Law. But I Think He Was In Hollywood Too Long. He Signed It, 'best Wishes, Ronald Reagan.'

George Burns Has Been On My Show Twenty Or Thirty Times, Or Maybe More. How Can You Turn Down A Guy That Age?

When The Public Starts Classifying You As Thoughtful, Someone Given To Serious Issues, You Find Yourself Declassified As A Humorist.

I'm An Entertainer; I Try To Give The Public What It Wants While I'm On The Screen, And I'm Completely Sincere About It. If I Don't Happen To Be A Laughing Boy Off The Screen, That Doesn't Make Me A Hypocrite Or A Phony.