I'm Very Shy So I Became Very

I Have My Own Gym. When You Do Jokes And They Sell, You Get A Gym.

Eddie Fisher Married To Elizabeth Taylor Is Like Me Trying To Wash The Empire State Building With A Bar Of Soap.

I Think If I Took Therapy, The Doctor Would Quit. He'd Just Pick Up The Couch And Walk Out Of The Room.

What I Do Is, I Make Fun Of People And I Make Fun Of Myself And Things Around Us And Exaggerate Things. And I'm Never Mean-spirited. See, The Word Insult Means Some Guy Who's A Real Unkind Human Being. But I Don't Do That, Because Otherwise I Wouldn't Be Headlining All These Years, Thank God, And All These People Showing Up To See Me.

When You're 18, You're Just So Busy Being Scared And Having Fun - A Crazy Mixture - That You Never Thought Of Dying.