I'm Not Lazy. I'm Simply Judicious About

This Is Terrific! What Fun! Maybe Tomorrow I Can Go To The Prom With My Brother. The Day After, Perhaps I Can Wear White Pants And Unexpectedly Get My Period.

I Don't Mean To Get All Religious Here, But I'm Pretty Sure Key Lime Martinis (with A Graham Cracker & Sugar Rim) Are Proof That Jesus Loves Us.

The Living Room Is A Monument To My Impulsive Spending Habits. I've Got More Than Two Hundred Dvds, Including Cinematic Greats Such As Monkey Bone, Corkey Romano, And A Night At The Roxbury, Leading Me To Believe Not Only Do I Have Awful Taste In Films, But I Also Have A Chris Kattan Fixation. What I Don't Have Is $4000 Earing Intrest In A Money Market Account.

I Believe That I Have Such A Vanilla Life.

Ambien Might Have Mentally Just Tossed My Salad. With Croutons.