I'm Not As Good A Swimmer As

I Think Fur Looks Better On An Animal Than On A Human Being. So I Dress My Dog In A Mink Teddy.

What Is Eternity? You're On The Checkout Line At A Supermarket. There Are Seven People In Front Of You. They Are All Old. They All Have Two Carts And Coupons For Every Item. They Are All Paying By Check. None Of Them Have Id. It's The Checkout Girl's First Day On The Job. She Doesn't Speak Any English. Take Away Fifteen Minutes From That, And You Begin To Get An Idea Of What Eternity Is.

Lord Please Break The Laws Of The Universe For My Convenience. Amen.

I Have A Lot More Things To Talk About Now Because I'm An Adult.

My Classmates Would Copulate With Anything That Moved, But I Never Saw Any Reason To Limit Myself.