I'm Going To Start Water Skiing Someday...as

I Was A Vegetarian Until I Started Leaning Toward The Sunlight.

My Parents Always Told Me I Could Do Anything, But Never Told Me How Long It Would Take

The Logic Was, There Weren't Too Many Female Comedians, So I Thought I Might As Well Try A Field That Had Fewer Competitors Than The Field I Was In, Which Was Acting, Singing And Dancing.

I Want To Have Children, But My Friends Scare Me. One Of My Friends Told Me She Was In Labor For 36 Hours. I Don't Even Want To Do Anything That Feels Good For 36 Hours.

Men Have Higher Body Temperatures Than Women. If Your Heating Goes Out In Winter, I Recommend Sleeping Next To A Man. Men Are Like Portable Heaters That Snore.