I'll Tell 'ya How To Stay Young:

I See The Beatles Have Arrived From England. They Were 40 Pounds Overweight - And That Was Just Their Hair.

We Have 51 Golf Courses In Palm Springs. He [president Ford] Never Decides Which Course He Will Play Until After The First Tee Shot.

I Grew Up With Six Brothers. That's How I Learned To Dance - Waiting For The Bathroom.

Jack Benny Really Liked My Book. I Know Because He Called Me Up From The Library And Told Me.

Eighty Is When You Order A Steak And The Headwaiter Puts It Through The Blender. Or When You Wake Up As Many Times During The Night As Burt Reynolds, But Not For The Same Reason.