If Your Thighs Look Like The Hood

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Favorite Christmas Present Was A Painting On Black Velvet.

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Momma Would Rather Go The Racetrack Than The Kennedy Center.

I Have Never Been Jealous. Not Even When My Dad Finished Fifth Grade A Year Before I Did.

You Might Be A Redneck If The First Words Out Of Your Mouth Every Time You See Friends Are Howdy!, Hey! Or How Y'all Doin'?

I Turned Down A Movie This Summer Because It Was Nine Weeks In Vancouver And My Oldest Daughter Is 14. I've Got Four More Summers With Her. I'm Not Giving Away Nine Weeks Of Her Summer To Go Do A Silly Movie.