If You Take A Negative, Turn It

This Is A Dream Come True. Hbo Is The Highest Echelon In The World For A Stand-up Comedian To Attain. Throughout My Career I've Trusted My Instincts To Lead Me Down The Right Path, And I Am Honored To Work Together With This Network While Contributing To The Legacy That Is Hbo.

Sometimes The Only Solution Is Figuring Out A Bigger Problem To Focus On.

Dear Semi Hot Girl Taking Photos On A Boat. It's Not Your Boat So Stop Acting Like You Own It. You Drive A Used Civic.

We Never Had A Pool, Right. So One Summer, I Remember. My Dad, To Make Me Happy. You Know I Was Bummed Out Cause We Didn't Have The Pool. So One Summer He Bought Us This Thing. It Was Yellow, You Laid It On The Lawn, Sprayed It With The Water, Run Across. Slip N' Slide. Yeah. Would Have Been Fun If Dad Checked For Rocks Before He Laid It Down! Slip N' Bleed From The Anus They Should Have Called This Ride.

It Really Drives Me Banana Sangwich.